I feel like taking a scalpel of hurt.
Cut open my chest to take out my heart.
It hurts. In a phisycal way.
I can’t calm it. Nor can I tame it.
I can’t decide what hurts more.
My heart or my feelings?
My body trembling.
I feel like crying. But I can’t.
My habits from the dark comes back.
Numbness of anesthesia flood my being.
I rock back and forth like a mental patient.
Stare in the blank space like something is there.
Hallucinations is my friend.
Paranoia, my mother.
The one I love.
The one I can’t explain.
They tell me I’m crazy.
But they don’t know me. Never will, like you.
I don’t lay my heart out like I did.
But I let you steal my heart.
And you still don’t know you already have.
I can’t say what I want to.
Unexplainable me, you.